Deep Dive Series: The Power of Building Defenses Against the Fear of No
By Tana M. Mann Easton, Lead Efficiency Engineer
Our blog post two weeks ago outlined an exercise that can help build familiarity and courage against the fear of hearing and saying no. If you need more practice, give this drill a try…
Grab a partner and make 30 requests – a high five, to take you out to lunch, to fly you to Paris, to pay off your house. Your partner will say no to every request. After each no, take a moment to note how you feel in your body when you’re denied. Does your core feel like it’s contracting? Does your face feel hot? Does your gut drop? Whatever you feel, notice it as quickly as you can, and once noticed, turn your energy back to your partner. Ask your next question when you feel any negative reactions recede and you’re ready. When you finish your requests, switch roles with your partner. Try this exercise as often as needed to acquaint yourself with how your body feels when denied and how long it takes for those feelings to subside. Hopefully at some point this drill will help you realize that feelings (even negative ones) are only temporary. They come and they go, and there’s no need to feel fear of hearing or saying no.
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Sincerely Yours,
Focus to Evolve Team